- Couples Therapy
- Couples Therapy
Relationship Therapy in Alfaz del Pi
The problem isn't the argument. It's what the argument is really about.
You promised yourself you wouldn't have this conversation again. Yet somehow, here you are.
One of you feels unheard. The other feels misunderstood.
One withdraws. The other pushes harder.
The same pattern repeats itself, leaving both of you feeling frustrated, disconnected and wondering how two people who love each other can end up feeling so far apart.
If this sounds familiar, you're not alone.
Most couples don't come to relationship therapy because they've stopped loving each other. They come because they no longer understand what keeps happening between them.
What if the conflict isn't the real problem?
Many couples believe they need to communicate better. Communication certainly matters. But in my experience, it is rarely where lasting change begins.
Because before we speak ... we feel. Before we react ... our nervous system has already responded.And before our partner says anything, our past has often already decided what we hear.
We don't enter a relationship as a blank page.
We bring our childhood experiences.
Our beliefs.
Our fears.
Our unmet emotional needs.
Our ways of protecting ourselves.
Without realising it, we often ask our partner to heal wounds they didn't create. And we become triggered by parts of them that quietly reflect something within ourselves.
This is why many couples keep having the same argument, just with different words.
My approach
I don't believe relationship therapy is about deciding who is right. Or teaching couples a script for better communication. Communication becomes easier when understanding comes first.
That is why my work begins somewhere else. I help each partner understand themselves. Because when you begin to recognise your own emotional patterns, triggers and needs, you naturally begin to understand your partner differently.
Blame softens.
Defensiveness decreases.
Curiosity returns.
And real conversations become possible.
In my practice, relationship therapy is a process of awareness, personal growth and reconnecting, not only with each other, but also with yourself.
There is no villain
One of the biggest fears couples have before starting therapy is that someone will be blamed. That one partner will be told they are the problem. That isn't how I work.
Every reaction has a story. Behind anger there is often hurt. Behind withdrawal there is often fear. Behind criticism there is often a longing to feel valued. Both partners deserve to be heard. Both partners have emotional needs. Both partners bring strengths and vulnerabilities into the relationship.
My role is to create a safe space where both stories can exist at the same time. Without judgement. Without taking sides.
Because healing begins when we stop asking: "Who is right?"
And start asking: "What is happening inside each of us?"
Looking beneath the surface
Every couple is unique. That is why I do not follow a fixed protocol. Depending on your relationship and your goals, we may work with:
• Relationship pattern awareness
• Emotional needs (Innerchild work)
• Family constellations and systemic work
• Mindfulness and self-awareness
• Emotional regulation (Somatic work and psychology)
• Reflection exercises
• Understanding relationship dynamics
Not every method is part of every journey. Together we explore what will best support your relationship.
Family Constellations
Sometimes couples understand their relationship with their mind … but still feel stuck.
Family constellations help uncover unconscious dynamics that often originate long before the relationship itself.
Patterns we inherited. Roles we learned. Needs we still carry.
When appropriate, I integrate individual family constellations for each partner within the relationship process. The other partner is welcome to observe.
Again and again I witness how this creates something conversations alone often cannot:
Understanding.
Not because behaviour is excused. But because it finally makes sense.
Relationship Therapy is also personal growth
One of the things I love most about working with couples is seeing what happens when each person starts taking responsibility for their own inner world.
Instead of trying to change each other … they begin to understand themselves. Ironically, this is often the moment relationships begin to change.
Because the healthier your relationship with yourself becomes, the healthier your relationship with your partner can become.
Each session lasts 90 minutes and costs €140
Couples Therapy: Is This Right for You?
Relationship therapy may help if you:
Keep having the same arguments.
Feel emotionally disconnected.
Want to understand each other better.
Feel stuck in recurring patterns.
Struggle to express your needs.
Want to strengthen your relationship before it reaches a crisis.
Are navigating a major life transition.
Simply want to grow together.
You don't have to wait until things fall apart. Often the strongest relationships are built by couples who choose to grow before they reach breaking point.
Practical information
Sessions last up to 90 minutes and take place in my practice in Alfaz del Pi. The costs are €140.
Because every relationship is different, I don't work with a fixed programme. Some couples come with one specific issue they would like support with. Others choose a longer process to create deeper and more lasting change.
While meaningful insights can arise in a single session, sustainable change takes time.
In my experience, couples who are committed to understanding themselves and creating lasting change attend an average of six sessions. This allows enough time to move beyond the immediate conflict and work with the deeper patterns influencing the relationship.
If you prefer, we can also discuss a more structured trajectory together. The process will always be tailored to your relationship, your goals and your pace.
Not ready to take the next step just yet?
I understand. Starting therapy can feel like a big decision.
If you'd like to get to know my approach first, I'd love to invite you to begin with The Relationship Pattern Finder.
This free guided workbook isn't about fixing your relationship. It's about helping you understand the patterns beneath it.
Because awareness is often where meaningful change begins.
Every relationship tells a story
Sometimes that story has become difficult to read.
Sometimes it simply needs a different perspective.
My role is not to tell you how your story should end.
My role is to help you understand it.
Because understanding creates awareness.
Awareness creates choice.
And choice creates the possibility for lasting change.
If you're ready to take that first step together, I'd be honoured to walk alongside you.